It’s 1960. Big wigs have taken over Madison Avenue, Doris Day is in the pictures, Neil Armstrong won’t set foot on the moon for another nine years, and Andrew Ryan’s Rapture Colony has evolved into an entire city under the sea.
You know the feeling you got the first time you saw the “no Gods, only Man” banner? Welllll we’ve tracked down the best BioShock merchandise, t-shirts and plushies that totally recapture it!
1. Sleep Next To Your Own Big Daddy Plush
BioShock’s Big Daddy continues, in vain, to look for his Little Sister. Why don’t you apply for the job and get your hands on this plush? It’ll make his day. – Official BioShock merchandise.
2. Discover Rapture In This BioShock Prequel Book
You can’t expect a sneaky Jim-Jones-without-the-budget-kool-aid type to tell you the origins of their city. You have to read about it yourself, and BioShock: Rapture fills in all the details we might’ve missed.
3. “A Man Chooses, A Slave Obeys” – Andrew Ryan T-Shirt
He’s not wrong but considering (puppet master Frank Fontaine in the guise of) Andrew Ryan also makes slaves of man, on which side of the coin do we actually fall?
4. Big Daddy-Inspired BioShock Backpack (With A Little Sister Zipper!)
It’s not a murse, it’s a satchel. Or in this case, it’s a backpack that’ll come in handy when looting corpses. I want this one bad.
5. BioShock Infinite Bird Necklace
BioShock is mistaken for steampunk a lot. It’s not totally wrong, it’s just a bit wrong. But that’s okay, where Andrew Ryan fails, Comstock’s got us covered.
6. Speaking Of Andrew Ryan: This Notebook Is Pretty Menacing – We Love It!
Donald Trump kind of makes him /and/ Frank Fontaine look like sweet baby angels. I could get behind a mass move to Rapture, couldn’t you?
7. 4 BioShock Coasters With Rapture Poster Designs
8. BioShock Funko POP!: Mega Big Daddy
Not to be mistaken for the Adam Sandler movie of the same name. No, really, don’t ruin Big Daddy’s rep like that or he won’t let you wear his suit when it really counts. Want to see more awesome bobbleheads? Check out or Fallout Bobbleheads list.
9. Big Daddy Helps His Little Sister Into The Vent On This Tanktop
I don’t want to spoil the end for anyone that hasn’t played. I’m just gonna say, leaving her behind to suffer might not be such a bad idea. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
10. A BioShock Plasmid T-Shirt To Stop The Bees From Going Extinct
That’s what I’d use it for. I’d use it every time I could, not to attack my foes, but rather to pollinate the planet. #justasuggestion
11. And Some Plasmid Bottles To Aid You In Your Plight
I mean, if you want. Alternatively, you could just stick your American-version-of-Pimms in them since ’tis the season.
12. This Dr. Seussian BioShock T-Shirt Kinda Makes Up For Cat In The Hat
And if you’ve ever seen Mike Myers’ horror film of the same name, you know that’s a hard case of PTSD to overcome.
13. A Spectacular, Hand Drawn Pin Of Poet, Sculptor, Playwright, And Composer: Sander Cohen
No man, no being, no creature in Rapture is as fabulous as Sander Cohen. King of Eccentricities and Queen of the Theatre, with time and this pin, you too can have a fraction of his fierceness.
14. La Fabuleuse T-Shirt de… Mr. B and His Little Sister
Big Daddy is the protector you want for your children, and Little Sister is the cute little tyke you want to eat the souls of your enemies. Come on, Mr. B! Wear me! This Big Daddy Shirt is definitely one of the best Bioshock Merchandise you can find on the internet.
15. BioShock Funko POP!: Little Sister (Complete With Her Syringe-y Thing!)
Little Sister will watch over you all night. When you open your eyes, you’ll see yellow ones staring right at you, and we all know pooping yourself is fun for the whole family!
16. Philosophize BioShock With A Rational Book That’ll Answer All Of Your Questions
Or most, anyway. BioShock is so fascinating that every part of it brings a deeper thought. Anyone that might’ve gotten pissed at the ending of Infinite, should really go back and reassess with this book.
17. My Neighbor Totoro T-Shirt Is, In Fact, A Big Daddy One In Disguise
Aficionados of Hayao Miyazaki’s Studio Ghibli rejoice, your favorites are now impenetrably linked on this shirt. Why not inception your geekery? You’ll feel better for it.
For more video game awesomeness make sure to check out or Fallout merchandise post.